Razors in apples? Dirty syringes in Tootsie Rolls? Britney announcing another offspring? Sure, these things easily scare the bejesus out of me, but not as much as these things:
1. Elvis tops chart for dead celebrity money-makers
Pretty frightful how the people on the list are worth more dead than alive. I'm sure John Lennon is turning...
2. Leafs making the playoffs. Ha ha! I know this is more comical than frightening, since it's looking more and more likely in the infancy of this season that the good ship Blue team will not right the ship in time to make an appearance at the spring dance; still, stranger things have happened, and therefore can be construed as scary...
3. The return of the Backstreet Boys.
Honestly, how does this pre-pubescent drivel continue to bubble to the surface? Didn't Nick Carter overdose or something? No? Well, here's hoping...
4. The inevitable return of the Mullet and the Rat Tail
C'mon, we all know how cyclical fashion is. It's just a matter of time before we're all wearing acid-wash again.
Happy Halloween!
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